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Sex is Sacred. Period.

This Manifesto is written to all the women who have been abandoned with betrayal, heart broken in massive confusion, misguided with shame, guilt and demonization from the potency, beauty and depth of their creative life force energy and wholeness and as of a result have been deprived from the their highly intuitive, powerful and pleasurable body.

Has there been a time when you didn’t know where to seek support and safety around the holistic wholeness of your own sexuality? Has there been a time in which you said YES, when you really wanted to say NO?! Has there been at time when you received mixed singals about what sexuality means to you from family, friends, lovers, society, aliens, and who knows who! Has there been a time in which you felt you had absolutely no control over your own body? Has there been a time in which you felt abandoned by your community, lover, and unique connection to spirit, creator, source energy?

This is the time for women to claim the powerful wisdom of their highly intuitive and pleasurable body.  As she claims her holistic wholeness and power consciously she is also helping restore her ability to lead the restoration of Mother Earth herself! A time when women claim all aspects of themselves including her shame free, guilt free and taboo free sexuality such as understanding the gift of her menstrual period is now upon us. The most potent time of the month for a women and her community is the time of her menstrual cycle. A time before man decided to socially and culturally encage her by having her work under fluorescent lights, sit for hours in a chair, and stick up a man made and environmentally clutter filling device up her yoni in Sanskrit for womb or vagina, and interrupting her natural grace and flow. This is the time in which women come together under the red tent to hold the most powerful visions for their community and our planet for the next lunar cycle. When women misuse this time, they most likely become miserable and suffer of pain. This is a result of a disconnection from the remarkable wisdom of her intuitive body. I was once a victim of the disconnection of my holistic wholeness and power. I was once dormant to my intuitive abilities and power to transform and heal using my life force energy. But I no longer find myself in that place and for this same reason, I am sharing with you why Sex is Sacred. Period.

Before becoming a highly orgasmic being in tune with the energies around me, I became a zombie who was cut off from my own sexuality and pleasure. I was ridiculously confused at a very early age when  my sexuality was demonized at the age of 6 after incidentally having my first orgasm!

I went from an ecstatic blissful innocent state to becoming sinfully demonized by my inherited conditioned past to discover for the next 20 years the hard way that a healthy relationship to my sexual energy or life force energy is powerful, transformational, and beautiful. More than anything sexual energy collectively as a human specie is in urgent need for loving depth, transparent communication, authentic transformation, honorable respect, and conscious celebration!

This is how it all began…

The birds were chirping on another perfect sunny day in Southern California and I was playing outside, alone and following my bliss. In solitude, I found total happiness and joy in pretty much everything I did. I fell in love with running, chasing butterflies, climbing trees, roller blading, biking until one day on this perfect sunny day I climbed into an ecstatic orgasmic state.

WOOOOWW!! What was that??!! What just happened? What was all that pleasure that rushed through my body that I just experienced? Where did it come from? Did anyone else experience this? Did anyone else see this?!

Confused and totally blissed out in this ecstatic state, I had just experienced my first orgasm at the age of 6 when climbing the side of a swing set! I didn´t really know what to do or who to ask about my experience. I mean how could I explain and put this orgasmic experience into words? I was only 6 and could barely even remember my own home address!

Surely enough I attempted to experience this orgasmic feeling again but soon realized the first time was more enjoyable and organic, and most importantly the second time around it was wrong, dirty, shameful and I was a bad girl according to my mother who apparently saw me enjoying the swing set a little too much.

My erotic innocence and orgasmic state transformed into a world of sin, demonization, shame, fear, guilt, and massive confusion. For decades following this orgasmic perfect sunny day, I carried and inherited these dark wounded networks of beliefs and conversations that existed from many generations before my family’s’. After my mother unconsciously made me feel awkwardly shameful for enjoying pleasure, that night on my knees like a good little catholic Mexican girl, I made a promise to God that I would never ever allow myself to experience pleasure again because if I did I would not be loved by my mother or by God himself! Forced to completely shut off my sexuality and sensuality, I innocently hoped that one day after marriage I would be deserving enough to receive that kind of pleasure again in my life.

Shut off from my sexuality through my genitalia, I began running and using this sexual, primal, and creative life force energy on the ground with my bare feet to run fast and far away. At times I felt I was running away from my own pleasure and from myself. Until one day I surprisingly ran into pleasure, literally and metaphorically speaking. I was hooked on what has been coined as “runner’s high” from having my first out of body running experience at nationals, and a few years after that I was initiated into the world of sacred sexuality when I ran into my second tantric lover who happened to be an internationally acclaimed sex educator.

Before running into pleasure I injured myself from over running and dishonoring the need to restore my body. I couldn’t give myself the permission to restore itself because the 6 year old in me made a promise to never again feel and allow pleasure in my body. By cutting off the pleasure threshold in my life which manifested in the neglecting the need to rest my athletic body running 70 miles a week, inevitably pain from over running related injuries became my teacher.

I ran myself to the ground, dishonored my body by denying it its own needs once again. Running was what I was known for. I broke every school record since 8th grade, and now in my early 20′s there´s no way I would let 4 years of mysterious injuries get in the way of something so special  to me. With a year left to still qualify for nationals in the 10,000 meters I knew I had to do something radical!

A flight overseas later, a leave of absence from a few too many part-time jobs, I was on my way to complete a semester and “study” abroad in Bolzano, a small town in Northern Italy. Landing onto an unfamiliar cobble stone ground, this living experience would become one of the most harmonious, healing and cobble stone grounding integrations of my life!

For the next four chilly morning months on a bike route alongside a crispy flowing river, I ran with the intention of restoring the integrity of my emotional body.

I say “emotional body” because I believe human beings store emotions in their bodies so that only they can do the inner work needed to release them out of their lives. Each emotion has its own intelligence with a unique message to unveil, understand, and release by implementing the wisdom into their lives. Sometimes the lack of awareness in understanding the intelligence behind emotions gets people to make impulsive decisions or even radical conscious ones like moving oversees. No matter how far you run away the emotion will be stored in your body until the inner world work is done. These emotions are one the first ways for people to intuitively know when something feels right or wrong in their bodies, before it becomes a dis-ease in their lives.

Waking up finally with the right amount of sleep, I allowed myself to listen to the messages my emotional body was trying to tell me, and honor it with the rest I so needed. After all I wanted to come back to the states and run at nationals despite my 4 years of mysterious running related injuries.

On my period and in excruciating pain, I was confronted by the disconnection of my integrated blissful body. Because you see “Bliss is the ability to deeply feel pain, pleasure and everything in between.” I had accumulated 15 years of being disconnected from fully accepting and embracing all aspects of my body including feeling pleasure. This was a kind of an excruciating pain I was not use to…. I mean I actually stopped and for the record, I don’t stop…. I´ll slow down if i have to but I won’t stop unless there´s a red light or I need to use the restroom. I’ve accumulated a high level of tolerance for pain over the course of 30,000 miles, so this was something else!

The disconnection of my body was expressed through victimhood and the absolute need for self compassion, love, honor and control over my body. On my period and in pain I declared out loud, “I´m no longer a victim of my own body. I am healing myself and by the time I cross that tree (which was about 200 feet away from me), I´m running with ease and grace.”

With that declaration out loud I stepped closer into my new reality and began running into my new possibility of self healing, honor, respect and love for my body. My period or what I prefer to call “moon cycle” became the catalyst, ground, and a living divine cycle within me for deeper wisdom and inner discovery, truth, and realization.

Feeling super proud of accomplishing something that felt impossible, I ran back to my tiny apartment with more energy and inspiration to take control of my life and body! I was so inspired that the following day I did my first and last successful 10 day master lemon cleanse, something that I would never in a million years possibly imagine to accomplish because like a bird I eat often.

Pass a year forward, it’s 6 am I’m running on way to my coaches office to suddenly complete a healthy and successful cross country season as the school record holder in the 6k for Cal Poly Pomona.  A few months after this accomplishment, on my moon cycle, I hit the national provisional qualifying time in the 10,000 meters.

Creating a relationship with my menstrual moon medicine became a catalyst, ground, and a living cycle for my transformation. I went from not being able to run at all in excruciating pain on my period, to running my fastest time on my moon and qualifying for nationals that same day. “I believe the relationship to our moon cycle is one of the most sacred gifts for women and the restoration of mother Earth’s harmony.”

The following May at the end of track season, a week before my senior year finals, on a rubber track with the support of 13 track officials in their red suits keeping track of the all the women from all over the nation complete 25 laps on the track, I finished my last race at the NCAA II Track & Field Championships for Cal Poly Pomona. By integrating, implementing and healing the blissful connection and wisdom of my body, I accomplished the impossible!

Though I accomplished the impossible for someone who was injured for 4 years by re-claiming the love, honor and integrity of my body, I found myself yearning for something else. Something that didn’t consist of running away from myself or running to something but rather ecstatically embracing this present moment fully without having to move, jump, dance, run around or needing to please my family, coach, team, and friends, but simply being still.

A year after nationals, I quit my Nike elite racing team and went from running 70 + miles a week to maybe 15, and put my meditative practice that kept me grounded, happy, and healthy for years on a pause.

The desire to find a meaningful and purposeful passion got me on an emotional roller coaster ride of intense pleasure, pain and everything in between including depression and my version of enlightenment. Before running into pleasure, pain became my teacher, and after pain became my teacher, self love became my teacher in reconnecting with the wholeness of my life force energy.

After having a fall out with what I believed to be the love of my life, in the middle of my post abortion 6 month depression staring at the lavender wall of my high school bedroom where all my high school records and medals lived adorned with photos of an accomplished scholar athlete. I didn’t want to get out of bed. Confused and in total resentment, I asked myself, “Where did I go wrong?” Heartbroken, I didn’t feel like doing anything anymore. What was the point? Where did I lose myself?

For months I couldn’t see a man in the eyes, unless he was a co-worker or a client I was taking dinner orders for. I was too angry, too resentful, too confused and afraid to connect with a man again especially sexually. I was too ashamed of my past for falling in love, moving in with my boyfriend, having an abortion, and losing myself in the relationship.

Until one Halloween night when I briefly glanced into his eyes and BAM it hit me like lightning! I felt something alive that was once dormant. A familiar ecstatic feeling I shared with my first tantric boyfriend, but this time it was different and very strong.

Confused and not knowing what to do, I let it go… until I saw him again a few months later at 5am in a private loft New Years after Party in down town LA.  Unable to take his eyes off me, and shamelessly unable to hide it either, he was determined I would notice his silly bold behavior. After the creepy awkwardness slipped out of my system, I couldn’t help to notice how much I enjoyed this invisible sexual energy we exchanged without even physically touching each other.

The total acceptance and safety allowed this ecstatic energy or “chemistry” we co created to re-ignite a new level of excitement within myself. Little did I know he would become the man that empowered, assisted the healing and liberation of my sexuality. Before him, ever since I can remember I made myself completely wrong for feeling pleasure, or even fantasizing about it.

A few weeks after New Years, on his massage table, he gave me the gift of receiving pleasure to simply receive without the need of giving back in return. I surrendered and let go of my identity, and gave birth to a new women. Ground breaking for me at the time.

Finally granting my body with the permission of reconnecting itself with its own pleasure after making a 6 year old painful decision to disconnect with itself based on inherited fear, confusion, shame, and disempowering beliefs, I was no longer afraid of being punished or abandoned. This blissful connection of pain, pleasure and everything in between, or bliss was necessary for my healing, transformation, and restoration of the integrity of my emotional body.

Now reminiscing on the connection of fully embracing pleasure back into my life, I ran my fastest and healthiest during my last year in college because this was around the same time I also lost my virginity and became the most sexually active I’ve ever been in my life.

Two in a half years after my first receiving pleasure initiation and giving myself the permission to FULLY feel the blissful wisdom of my body, I began learning from some of the worlds most known tantric masters and priestesses. Gaining an incredible amount of knowledge and wisdom through ancient teachings in seminars, retreats, teacher training, and lots of practice, I began integrating this awakened knowledge that was once dormant within my body. Knowledge used to create more harmonious ecstasy and pleasure in my life and those around me.

A year after this awakening, I decided to embark on a challenging “heroes” journey that I would never in a million years imagine to dare and dance into. In the toxic gambling circus vortex of a city full of sins, I decided to become an exotic dancer at the worlds best strip clubs in the world with the intention to explore the power of my feminine life force energy. The same club where I met Rihianna and where she felt the need to whisper and affirm in my ear, “I’m a rockstar” among other things I will leave out for your curiosity. At Spearmint Rhino I became Fuego, the undercover dakini who danced with fire.

 

Here is a brief story of my journey as Fuego.

“IX-CHEL, THE DAKINI WHO DANCED WITH FIRE.”

by Ixchel on MAY 10, 2012 in BLOG

I’m writing from the 21st floor of Veer Towers on the strip here in Las Vegas.

I am Self-initiating and dancing into the stripper world of Las Vegas as “iX-CheL, The dakini who danced with fire.”

A Dakini is a female embodiment of enlightened energy, the wisdom of the divine feminine force of nature incarnated into human form. We all have this inner Shakti energy, and we can all harness it to become “Sky-Dancers” -cultivating sacred sexual energy and then releasing it in abundance to the world!

At the club I’m known as “Fuego”, which translates to fire in Spanish. In many ways, I do feel like I’m dancing with fire, dancing between the fine lines of life, and bringing forth new elements in an already established toxic environment. I see myself as an undercover dakini, bringing light into the dark cigar and cigarette smoking club. Serving a missing ecstatic and tantric transmission for the beings who are attracted to me and showing up in ways in which they cannot even possibly imagine because Fuego is an authentic expression and appearance for my soul. I became a rare kind of a gem deal in a Las Vegas stripper club.

I am in deep observation of the men and women who come to stripper clubs, the woman I am becoming as I “strip” the layers of my ego and get closer to the core of who I am. I have no idea what I’m getting myself into by being on this discovery unfoldment.

Before embarking on this journey, I knew I wanted to strip simply for the reason that it’s something I would never in a million years do and for that same reason also knew there was something in store for me. I have learned so much in such a short amount of time since I’ve been here.

I remember telling myself “Well, If I’m going to strip I might as well do so in Las Vegas.” I saw this as another extraordinary and fabulous adventure, though I was trembling deep down in my soul.  So far this has been a shocking, yet rewarding and powerful experience.

I say shocking because I am not use to everything that Las Vegas and Spearmint Rhino has to offer. Most importantly it is hard to BREATHE and be alive in this fabulous toxic desert. After all, I was living and running 3 miles away from the Pacific Ocean in San Diego!  This is just the tip of the iceberg of the intense shifts I’m “dealing” with in this gambling circus vortex.

I took on this journey with a big heart. Willing to share my vulnerability as I strip off as many layers of my ego as I possible with the desire to be in harmony with all parties involved.

06/30/12

My time in the gambling circus vortex in Las Vegas was an intense journey.  One I will always remember. In many ways I served my purpose and for that I am forever grateful.

As the undercover dakini iX-CheL I played as Fuego, and I do believe I called in and channeled out new elements in an already toxic establishment.

The stripper club in many ways was a temporary platform to play with self curiosity and discovery, as well as observe and learn from others, and most importantly my-Self.

I say most importantly my “Self” because through this journey, in order to channel, offer, give, and surrender into serving the sacred masculine within each of my clients I had to be fully present at my absolute best, and most alert at all times.

I do believe that all women at the club are extremely powerful and divine whether they know it or not. They have the ability to completely alter the experience of a man. Bring him to complete ecstasy or a living hell.

Being able to empower another man to be his best, to trust his heart, to help him realize his gifts, and allow him to experience being celebrated, adored, and cherished by the divine feminine energy was just a mutually serving gift.

This journey served me in realizing that I too, need and want love. That I have the ability to give love to a total stranger unconditionally and without any expectations other than our mutual serving agreements. The truth is most people have forgotten to love unconditionally and instead we have learned unconsciously to love conditionally instead of loving through harmonic agreements that allow both sexes and parties to thrive in love, creativity, and inspiration.

As the dakini I am, the priestess that I am transforming into being, I am able to do this because I value and honor the energetic exchange of tantric surrender. More than anything this is who I am at my core and depth. Sex to me is very sacred. I have an erotic nature that liberates and inspires truth, freedom, and actualization. Sexuality is not to be taken for granted or is not to an energy to be suppressed, ignored, dismissed, and left in the dark to rot. It’s an energy to consciously activate its awareness to restore the wisdom of our bodies and collectively as the body of water that exist on planet earth.

I also realized how much I was in need of receiving love, companionship, human connection, and restoring my own energy. I was giving all the tantric transmission and attention I had to my clients during our 4 hour transformational conversation, 3 dance show and 2 the completion of our first of many agreements. I called in and attracted my soul clients for a unique experience that I crafted in that present moment for them, and no one else.

I was blessed to meet some of the most fascinating men at the club who are still my friends today. I can say I gave it my all. I often left the club barely being able to drive back home. Good thing I lived on the strip, 5 minutes away!

There were times where I was so in need of receiving and feeling love without the need of giving back that I wasn’t making the best and most wise choices for myself like leaving at 7am from Rhino when I arrived at 8pm the day before! This sacred journey allowed me to see how the lack of receiving and giving love really affects people and the majority of our problems as a planet, world, species, and individuals.

We are authentically off when we don’t experience authentic human connection and our own creative life force energy. The kind of connection that is felt deep within our bones and soul to the point that the little hairs on our skin rise and become alive which were at one point once numb, asleep, dormant.

Working at the club, wasn’t easy at all. Most people say, “Stripping is easy money.” It’s definitely wasn’t easy for me, it’s simple in the sense of having sexy powerful woman in lingerie asking men in all toxic and non toxic shapes, colors and forms for what they want which is money for their time, but it sure aint easy when doing it consciously. When done with integrity, exotic dancing becomes an initiation for the divine feminine soul.

A lot of exotic dancers are independent women creating the life of their dreams by exchanging the use of her creative life force energy in an agreed container supported by a specific amount of time, money, and location. This is a woman who knows what she wants whether it’s an immediate need or a long term goal. She is courageously doing whatever it takes to bring the transformation she sees in her life. For some dancers, they need to shamefully hide her identity as a “sex worker.” She perhaps is not in the point in her life in which she can authentically embrace all aspects of her sexuality and therefore dancing unconsciously, in my opinion.

Some dancers are still figuring out their deepest gifts and unfortunately the strip clubs are the only platform for her to “safely” exchange her most treasurable gifts, her life force energy. The more conscious dancers which include the tribe of women I respect and admire are the loving warrior dakini’s who are dancing as they light the dark toxic cigar smoking club. They are the women claiming and embracing this feminine aspect of herself fully to bring exquisite balance and prosperity in her lives abundantly and consciously. I love helping women claim this part of herself so she can fully embrace her exotic queen-Domme. A queendom that is sourced from her dominating dakini energy and is intuitively guided by her spiritual consciousness and awareness.

One of the biggest challenges for Fuego was offering a transformational energetic transmission, valuable and dear to my heart at a strip club. A temporary platform that doesn’t fully support authentic and holistic sexuality but rather a contemporary quick fix of mediocre blown up superficial fantasies. Not having the right platform and ground to support the depth that I needed was a barrier to best communicating  this deep, shamanstic and exquisite tantric transmission. An experience that is not necessarily physically felt but energetically more than anything full of divine feminine sensuality that will leave you empowered, transformed, and cherished.

The 2 months of this initiation gave me time to discover the best ways to communicate and offer my gifts to the world, and for that I’m FOREVER grateful. I am forever grateful for the opportunity I had to impact the men and women on my path.

As of today, I still get emails and messages from men and women who value my work very deeply and profoundly. We are connected. I am in their heart and they are in mine. Together we are shifting and creating a world where sensuality, love, sexuality and all that is divine is celebrated, honored, and respected.

I am so grateful for the empowerment tools I have a walked away from being iX-CheL the undercover dakini who danced with Fuego. I left with more fire, wisdom, and most importantly a deeper understanding of my gifts, transforming and directing the use of life force energy for the benefit of all parties involved, the biggest gift of all.

Stepping into the exotic stripper archetype is still teaching me the integration of a healthy sexuality and spiritual lifestyle. This exquisite integration is the source of my creativity.

After the Fuego initiation, I took a break from working and started focusing again on my tantra yoga teacher training.

Today, daily and regularly I have full body orgasms by simply breathing. As an empath, my body has become that sensitive to the orgasmic breath within. As the heavens pour down and through my body, I give birth to my Amrita in Sanskrit for female ejaculation into a new world of honor, love, respect, and celebration. Being an orgasmic being is a spiritual blessing and as an empath it’s my responsibility to integrate the blissful wisdom that lies within my emotional body to evolve, transform, and inspire the activation of others too!

Orgasmic states are places within each and every single one of us. They’re blessings of insights, mystical experiences of creative life force energy available to help us restore the integrity of our emotional body, mind and spirt as a collective body of water that we are on planet Earth.

It is such an honor to coach woman now to activate the power of her feminine essence, and direct her life force energy to design the life of her dreams, simultaneously capturing and documenting this epic unfolding journey through film, photography, and writing.

It’s time to activate and integrate these infinite waves of bliss into our lives to actualize Heaven on Earth, breath by breath. As we birth sexual, primal, and creative energy into a new world of honor, celebration, respect, honor, and integrity!

Sexuality is sacred. Period.

In exquisite bliss,

iX-CheL

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